FRIDAY AFTERNOON QUARTERBACK: NFL WEEK THREE

BY ADAM GREENE

I was on a roll. A 16-0 straight up Week Two put me on a 19-game win streak and all I needed was for the Jacksonville Jaguars to show up and make it 20. Alas, it was not to be.

In the battle of epic facial hair, the prospector won as Ryan Fitzpatrick, sporting a beard worthy of riding a tauntaun on the ice planet Hoth, took apart the Jaguars in order to let us know, in no uncertain terms, the Jacksonville hype train would be derailed, decommissioned and set on fire.

Worse, I took a loss both straight up and against the spread as Miami won 31-13. Not the way I wanted to kick off the week.

Fitzpatrick didn’t even do his usual “fling it all over the place and hope it lands on my guy” thing. Instead, he was steady and accurate, completing 18 of 20 for 160 yards and two touchdowns, ensuring that Tua Tagovailoa will remain on the bench to America’s continued frustration.

Garnder Minshew II, who talked a big game with his mustache this week, should be forced to shave it like some old school WWE wrestling match after stinking up the place Thursday night.

As for me, the real victim here, I’ve got 15 more games with which to rebound. Let’s pick 13 of them here.

LAS VEGAS RAIDERS AT NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS (-5, O/U: 47.5)

Since his return to coaching in 2018, the Raiders’ Jon Gruden has never led his team to more than three wins in a row. The Patriots buzzsaw will keep that streak record intact. Patriots 31, Raiders 16

LOS ANGELES RAMS AT BUFFALO BILLS (-2.5, O/U: 47)

Start your day with the is game, tune into the Cowboys at Seahawks at 4:30 then wrap it up with the Packers at Saints on SNF and that’s about the best Week Three of football you could get. Here’s an interesting tidbit. Rams head coach Sean McVay is 10-2 against the AFC in the regular season. What does that mean for this game? Probably nothing, but LA has played in plenty of big games since McVay arrived on the scene. This one looms surprisingly large this early in the season. Rams 27, Bills 23

HOUSTON TEXANS AT PITTSBURGH STEELERS (-4, O/U: 45)

Bill O’Brien is on the ropes. His job is on the line and a pre-Thanksgiving firing is on the table. It would be the best possible thing to happen to this franchise since they drafted Deshaun Watson. But Watson is exactly why it won’t happen. Texans 30, Steelers 24

SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS at NEW YORK GIANTS (+4, O/U: 41.5)

In back to back weeks the 49ers travel to MetLife Stadium, playing on the same turf they blamed for taking out half their team. Quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo is questionable and didn’t practice Wednesday, so this might be Nick Mullins’ show to run. But don’t feel too good about the Giants. They already had the worst roster in the NFL when they had Saquon Barkley. Without him? This is an XFL team. 49ers 16, Giants 10

TENNESSEE TITANS AT MINNESOTA VIKINGS (+2.5, O/U: 49.5)

The concern over the Titans is probably premature as they’re doing the same thing they did throughout the AFC playoffs last season, ruining everyone’s straight bets and parlays. Titans 26, Vikings 20

WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM AT CLEVELAND BROWNS (-7, O/U: 45)

One good game against the Bengals does not a touchdown favorite make. This is exactly the kind of game the Browns must win to prove they’ve put their Brown-ish ways behind them. But Ron Rivera will not bring this team to Cleveland to be steamed by a touchdown. Browns 34, WFT 30

CINCINNATI BENGALS AT PHILADELPHIA EAGLES (-4.5, O/U: 46.5)

Get ready to read plenty of columns about how “Carson Wentz” is back after he beats a significantly weaker team led by a rookie QB. Eagles 24, Bengals 17

CHICAGO BEARS AT ATLANTA FALCONS (-3, O/U: 47.5)

There are different kinds of 2-0 just as there are different kinds of 0-2. Dan Quinn, Adam Gase, Bill O’Brien and Matt Patricia are all neck and neck in the race to unemployment, but Chicago won’t be the team that gets him catapulted over the wall just yet. Falcons 23, Bears 20

NEW YORK JETS AT INDIANPOLIS COLTS (-11, O/U: 44)

The Colts opened the year with what looked like, at the time, a bad loss, then got handed a couple of cupcakes like a kid who didn’t cry getting his school shots. I don’t think the NFL should be done with Sam Darnold as a QB, but it might be time for the Jets to start looking elsewhere. Colts 38, Jets 17

CAROLINA PANTHERS AT LOS ANGELES CHARGERS (-6.5, O/U: 44)

Justin Herbert gets a start that he can actually prepare for. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing as you don’t mess with what’s working. Anthony Lynn should prep Easton Stick (a name I did not, in any way, make up) as the starter, then toss the keys to Herbert again at kickoff. Chargers 20, Panthers 13

DETROIT LIONS AT ARIZONA CARDINALS (-5.5, O/U: 55)

The Cardinals won’t play a team with even a .500 record until Oct. 19. They may make the playoffs just by default. Cards 37, Lions 27

TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS AT DENVER BRONCOS (+6, O/U: 43)

Everybody make sure you have the ringer on your phones turned on. Denver might be calling to sign you as their new quarterback at any moment. Bucs 27, Broncos 13

DALLAS COWBOYS AT SEATTLE SEAHAWKS (-5, O/U: 55.5)

Mike McCarthy and the Cowboys should be entering this game 0-2 looking to go 0-3. Can they ride the momentum of an historic comeback against the Falcons, a team that just seems to allow that to happen a few times a season? Not in Russell Wilson’s kitchen. Seahawks 34, Cowboys 30

THIS WEEK

Straight up: 0-1

Against the spread: 0-1

LAST WEEK

Straight up: 16-0

Against the Spread: 12-4

SEASON

Straight up: 27-5

Against the spread: 22-11

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