BAD BEATS: NFL WEEK 3

BY ADAM GREENE

This week we didn’t have crazy double-digit spreads, we didn’t have monster upsets and yet, lurking in the shadows like Jason Vorhees watching a group of college students unpack their conversion van, we still had a Bad Beat.

In fact, we had candidates for two, but I’m going to argue against that.

You could look at the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at the Los Angeles Rams as a Bad Beat, but that was a Bucs -1 spread at kickoff, so you knew it was going to be close. You had two of the best offenses in the league and Tampa’s defense has given up yardage and plays to everyone. If you took the under (55.5) there, you were really rolling the dice. The Bucs hadn’t been held under 30 points in nearly a calendar year.

They were this time, but it did you no good as Tom Brady tossed a garbage time TD to Giovanni Bernard to hit the over. It was Brady’s only TD pass of the night. Was there any point in the game where you really thought he wouldn’t get at least one?

Nope. That’s not a Bad Beat. It was an under to steer clear of from the start.

Our Bad Beat of Week 3 is as obvious as it was gut wrenching, because it got two sets of bettors with the line and the total. No one was safe as the Las Vegas Raiders won 31-28 in overtime over the Miami Dolphins.

The line? Raiders -4. The over/under? 44.5. The Dolphins? Starting their back up quarterback Jacoby Brissett. Las Vegas? Starting the most dangerous man in the land in 2021 so far, Derek Carr. Four points and the Raiders at home against an east coast team starting its No. 2 QB? What’s not to like?

You felt good. This was Vegas, baby! Time to push all your chips into the middle of the table and walk away with the down payment on that Suntracker Party Barge 22 RF XP3 Pontoon Boat you’ve saved in your favorites since July 2020 when it appeared the COVID-19 lockdown was going to last forever.

Now, seeing as your neighbors, if you live in an area like I do in Tennessee, are more prone to take Camel laxative than the miraculous vaccine we were handed by Dolly Parton, you were thinking back to your lake livin’ plan, cruising down the delta while avoiding the Delta Variant. Your vacation would not be ruined by a community of anti-vaxers popping bovine suppositories. You and your family would be alone on Old Man River, fishing, sunning and enjoying the day with nary a horse erectile dysfunction medication aficionado in sight.

For while, you had reason to be nervous. The Dolphins jumped out to a 14-0 lead thanks to a pick six and a stupid Raiders fourth down call deep in their own territory. Just 12 minutes into the game and that Suntracker was sailing away.

But, none to fear. Las Vegas got a safety on Miami’s next possession, then followed it up with a field goal. Derek Carr remembered he was the deadliest man in the NFL and reeled off a 95-yard touchdown drive to pull within two. Another Las Vegas touchdown on their first possession of the second half and they were up 19-14. There were your points. You’d at least get your money back. At worst, your plan to pick out your logs, lifting stakes and engine would be delayed a week.

Carr answered the call then, almost as if he too could feel the summer wind in his hair cruising down the Mississippi or Ohio or whatever river we’ve not turned into a trash gyre near you by unleashing an 11-play scoring drive capped by a one-yard run by Payton Barber to open the fourth quarter.

Miami would answer back with a field goal to make it 25-17, but you had an eight-point cushion. There was less than nine minutes to go in the game and after the teams traded possessions it was down to the final 3:22. The Dolphins started at their own 18, again with Brissett at QB. They had to play for the touchdown and go almost the length of the field. What were the chances?

It was time to start seriously thinking about how you were going to get the Suntracker to the lake, so you zeroed in on the optional tandem-axel trailer with dual axle brakes. What’s an extra $3,895 when you’ve got this game in the bag?

Brissett is an interesting guy. He obviously thinks he should be a starter in the league and is frustrated by teams continually sticking him as a No. 2. He’s played well when called upon, but much like Ryan Fitzpatrick and Tyrod Taylor, this is who he is. A guy who can spot start when you need him for an NFL franchise and a guy who can sink your dreams of buying a brand new pontoon boat if you’re an NFL bettor.

Because that’s exactly what he did. Brissett used every single tick left on the clock to drive Miami down the field and score it himself on a one-yard rush on fourth and goal with no time left on the clock. Just to tease you, he went ahead and hit Will Fuller for the 2-point conversion to send the game into overtime.

And if you’d bet the under, your day was done. Your Bad Beat just happened. But the line bettors still had hope.

Las Vegas won the toss and a touchdown would not only win them the game, but land you back on the river, maybe with the engine upgrade to that 200 liter FourStroke Mercury. I mean, there’s no reason to skimp on power when you’re trying to find the right fishing holes and swimming spots.

It was not to be. Las Vegas kicked a field goal and the dream was over. Your pontoon boat sunk before your eyes like it struck an iceberg. The Dolphins answered with their own field goal and the Raiders finished the game off with, of course, another three-pointer just to make sure you would be unable to go down with the ship.

Those lake days, just fantasies again as you are forced to venture back out into the world wiser and poorer, to walk amongst people trying to fight a pandemic with elephant hemorrhoid pills instead of a proven safe vaccine.

The NFL season is underway and the Week 3 Schedule is up and taking bets at BetOnline.AG.

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