FRIDAY AFTERNOON QUARTERBACK: NFL WEEK NINE

BY ADAM GREENE

I won’t call last week a comeback for me, but I certainly stopped the bleeding with a winning record both against the spread and straight up. The fact is, the losses weren’t even bad because nobody outside of Tua Tagovailoa’s mom would have picked them any differently.

You’re saying somebody saw the Dolphins knocking off the Rams? Or the Titans falling to the Bengals? How about the Vikings taking out the Packers? My guess is those were worldwide losses and killed many a suicide pool and parlay along the way.

The Thursday Nighter was a mixed bag for me. The Packers won, as I predicted, but I thought it would be closer. It turns out 49ers quarterback Nick Mullens had other ideas as Green Bay won 34-17. Truthfully, it’s how the game should have gone and maybe portends to a return to NFL normalcy this weekend.

Let’s make some picks!

Byes: Cincinnati Bengals, Cleveland Browns, Los Angeles Rams, Philadelphia Eagles

SEATTLE SEAHAWKS AT BUFFALO BILLS (+3, O/U: 55)

The Bills are a tough team built to win in the AFC, but they’re facing a Seattle team with a quarterback that can win anywhere. As long as Russell Wilson is slinging it, it’s going to be tough to pick against them. Seahawks 33, Bills 27

DENVER BRONCOS AT ATLANTA FALCONS (-4, O/U: 50)

Look at how that Falcons line starts to jump the minute they actually win a game. But, if anything, a -4 spread is an early lead and we know how that goes. I had no issues taking Atlanta here, but then I saw this video of Broncos QB Drew Lock rapping last year on the sideline, then watched him dance after tossing the winning TD pass against the Chargers and honestly, I am feeling this kid. I’m sticking with the ATL, but I’m not loving it. Falcons 24, Broncos 20

CHICAGO BEARS AT TENNESSEE TITANS (-6.5, O/U: 47.5)

Both these teams took tough losses last week. For the Bears, it was a gutty defeat at the hands of the New Orleans Saints. For Tennessee, it was a step into a rake, then a bucket, then face first into a pie rack before landing in a pile of horse manure against the Cincinnati Bengals. I think they might be a little upset about it. Titans 28, Bears 20

BALTIMORE RAVENS AT INDIANAPOLIS COLTS (pk, O/U: 47.5)

We’ve seen now twice that the Ravens can be schemed when facing a team with actual talent and the Colts have plenty. Colts 27, Ravens 23

CAROLINA PANTHERS AT KANSAS CITY CHIEFS (-10.5, O/U: 52.5)

The Panthers come into this game on a three-game losing streak only to face the Chiefs buzzsaw. The fact that this isn’t a two touchdown line is a testament to the job Matt Rhule and Teddy Bridgewater have done with a franchise that could have easily been bulldozed in all 16 games this season. Still, it’s Kansas City so what are you going to do? Chiefs 34, Panthers 20

DETROiT LIONS AT MINNESOTA VIKINGS (no line available)

As this game teeters on the edge of being moved or cancelled due to COVID-19 protocols that could cost Detroit Matthew Stafford and linebacker Jarrad Davis, another storyline has emerged; Lions DE Everson Griffen’s feelings are hurt. Whether that means a breakout game for the veteran defensive lineman or just a lengthy entry in his poetry journal, who can say? I’m making two picks here, because Stafford might play and no one should lay so much as a peso on this game until his status is certain. With Stafford, Vikings 27, Lions 23. Without Stafford, Vikings 33, Lions 10

HOUSTON TEXANS AT JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS (+7, O/U: 50.5)

The Jaguars’ preseason “Tanking for Trevor” plan would have gone off without a hitch if not for those meddling New York Jets. There are obviously still a couple of QBs that will go in the first round of the draft, Ohio State’s Justin Field and North Dakota State’s Trey Lance specifically. And unless they’re in love with one guy over the other, Jax might as well win a couple of games here. Not this week, but, you know, later. Speaking of QBs. The Jags are starting rookie Jake Luton out of Oklahoma State who, I kid you not, broke his back the last time he was on he field. This is a friendly spread is what I’m saying. Texans 31, Jaguars 6

NEW YORK GIANTS AT WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM (-1, O/U: 42.5)

Here it is, the game Scott Hansen will apologize for tossing to all day Sunday on NFL Redzone. Buddy, we’ve already forgiven you. Giants 23, WFT 20

LAS VEGAS RAIDERS AT LOS ANGELES CHARGERS (pk, O/U: 51.5)

With a clear path to the playoffs and a game advantage over the Cleveland Browns in the Wild Card race, this would be the perfect time for Las Vegas to blow it with a stupid loss. Chargers 24, Raiders 21

PITTSBURGH STEELERS AT DALLAS COWBOYS (+14, O/U: 41.5)

Ben DiNucci, we hardly knew ye. The Cowboys have decided to send The Nooch back to the bench as they’ve let Cooper Rush and Garrett Gilbert battle it out to start against one of the best pass rushes in the NFL vying to stay undefeated and a game ahead of the Kansas City Chiefs in the AFC home field advantage race. I think The Nooch is the real winner here. Steelers 34, Cowboys 9

MIAMI DOLPHINS AT ARIZONA CARDINALS (-4.5, O/U: 48.5)

Tua Tagovailoa picked up his first win as an NFL quarterback thanks to a complete meltdown by the quarterback of the opposing team last week. I don’t feel like you can count on that two games in a row and the Cardinals have a postseason spot on their minds. Cards 26, Dolphins 13

THIS WEEK

Straight up: 1-0

Against the Spread: 0-1

LAST WEEK

Straight up: 9-5

Against the spread: 8-6

SEASON

Straight up: 81-37-1

Against the spread: 61-58

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