NFL POWER RANKINGS: WEEK NINE

BY ADAM GREENE

While the top of the Rankings remains intact, we’ve got movement in the Top 10 as good teams found themselves facing some very bad luck in one of the strangest weekends of NFL football in a long time.

The bad losses were atrocious and while each team, I’m sure, took their defeat to vastly inferior opponents hard, the Power Rankings are the only way we can properly punish them for ruining our Sunday.

1. PITTSBURGH STEELERS (7-0)

The Steelers are undefeated, just knocked off their biggest rival in the Ravens and don’t see a team with a winning record on their schedule until they face those same Ravens again on Thanksgiving. They could be up here for a while. Last week: No. 1

2. KANSAS CITY CHIEFS (7-1)

The Chiefs get a break this week with the visiting Panthers, but then it gets all kinds of real with a road trip to Las Vegas for a chance at revenge against the Raiders then a cross-country jaunt to Tampa Bay to battle Tom Brady and the Buccaneers. Last week: No. 2

3. SEATTLE SEAHAWKS (6-1)

Russell Wilson donned his apron and chefs hat, clicked this tongs a few time and barbecued the 49ers off the field last Sunday to the tune of four touchdowns. His 26 TD passes through seven games leads the league. Last week: No. 5

4. BUFFALO BILLS (6-2)

The Bills exorcized the Patriots demon last week, claiming the top spot in the AFC East with nary a contender in their wake. Last week: No. 8

5. NEW ORLEANS SAINTS (6-2)

The Saints are winning, but Drew Brees is still hovering around the league’s cellar when it comes to air yards per completion at what is practically just a n extended hand off at 5.0 yards. Now he’s starting to lose pass catchers by the handful. This is a train that could derail at any moment especially as their schedule gets considerably tougher the rest of the way. Last week: No. 10

6. GREEN BAY PACKERS (5-2)

With Dalvin Cook’s footprints still embedded in their backs, the Packers now have to contend with the 49ers and the best scheme running attack in the sport. Last week: No. 3

7. BALTIMORE RAVENS (5-2)

Against the Steelers, Lamar Jackson completed only 13 passes in a full game’s work and had a sub 50 completion percentage. And they still almost won. Last week: No. 4

8. TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS (6-2)

In spite of winning the game, you have to believe Tom Brady would love to never play the Giants again for the rest of his life. Last week: No. 9

9. TENNESSEE TITANS (5-2)

The Titans were hardly the only team to soil the bed sheets on the weirdest NFL Sunday in recent memory, but they made it special by delivering Bengals rookie quarterback Joe Burrow his first real signature win. So, you know, nice of them. Last week: No. 6

10. ARIZONA CARDINALS (5-2)

The Cardinals had the week off to watch two of their NFC West compatriots literally and figuratively fall on their faces. Last week: No. 11

11. LOS ANGELES RAMS (5-3)

Speaking of that face fall and crazy Sunday, the Rams held the Dolphins to just eight first downs and 145 total yards… And lost. Last week: No. 7

12. INDIANAPOLIS COLTS (5-2)

The Colts were the beneficiaries of the Titans’ belly flop against Cincy. Now they get two shots at Tennessee over the next month to make the most of it. Last week: No. 15

13. LAS VEGAS RAIDERS (4-3)

The Raiders knocked off the Browns in what felt like a playoff elimination game halfway through a very strange season. Last week: No. 16

14. CHICAGO BEARS (5-3)

Here’s how bad the year has gone for former starter and now back up quarterback Mitchell Trubisky. In the one snap he took against the Saints Sunday, he injured his shoulder. Last week: No. 14

15. CLEVELAND BROWNS (5-3)

We’ve reached the halfway point of the season and the Browns, in spite of their loss Sunday, are still relevant and two games over .500. Last week: No. 12

16. SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS (4-4)

The 49ers now have a Super Bowl team on injured reserve and the wait staff from an Olive Garden on the field. Last week: No. 13

17. MIAMI DOLPHINS (4-3)

Tua Tagovailoa won the first start of his NFL career by passing for a total of 93 yards. Sunday was bizarre. Last week: No. 18

18. DETROIT LIONS (3-4)

If you want to see how bad a coach Matt Patricia is, watch him field a team without Matthew Stafford if the QB remains in COVID-19 protocol. Last week: No. 17

19. PHILADELPHIA EAGLES (3-4-1)

Two games in three weeks against the Giants is a good way to put a win streak together. Last week: No. 22

20. DENVER BRONCOS (3-4)

If the Raiders do stumble on their way to that final playoff seed, there’s a real chance this Broncos squad could sneak in there to be roundly crushed by the Chiefs or Steelers. Last week: No. 24

21. CAROLINA PANTHERS (3-5)

You know what you don’t want when riding a three-game losing streak; a trip to Kansas City. Last week: No. 19

22. NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS (2-5)

Sure, the Patriots look like they’re done, but so does Jason Vorhees every time he gets bashed in the head with a brick and we know how that turns out. Last week: No. 20

23. LOS ANGELES CHARGERS (2-5)

Justin Herbert might be cruising to the NFL’s Offensive Rookie of the Year Award, but this team won’t be a winner unless they make some wholesale coaching changes. Don’t waste this kid like you did a decade of Philip Rivers. Last week: No. 21

24. MINNESOTA VIKINGS (2-5)

Kirk Cousins completed just 11 passes and the Vikings won. This proves once and for all that the best way to win with Kirk Cousins is to not even try to win with Kirk Cousins. Last week: No. 28

25. CINCINNATI BENGALS (2-5-1)

Midway through the season, the Bengals are already playing for next year. And with Joe Burrow continuing to develop, that’s not a bad thing. Last week: No. 30

26. ATLANTA FALCONS (2-6)

The Falcons did the unthinkable last Thursday; they took a lead in the fourth quarter and held it. I told you, Week Eight was weirdsville, man. Last week: No. 27

27. WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM (2-5)

Here’s something fun. At 2-5, but with tie breaks, the Washington Football Team is currently in second place in the NFC East. Or is that something sad? Either way. Last week: No. 23

28. DALLAS COWBOYS (2-6)

Reportedly quarterbacks Garrett Gilbert and Cooper Rush are in a pitched battle to be the first one crushed by T.J. Watt Sunday when they play the undefeated Steelers. Last week: No. 25

29. HOUSTON TEXANS (1-6)

The Texans have a playoff roster and a middle school rec league coaching staff. Last week: No. 26

30. NEW YORK GIANTS (1-7)

The Giants are well on their way to their fourth Top Six NFL Draft pick in a row. Here’s the real question; are we in love with Daniel Jones? Because there’s a good chance they’ll have Justin Fields and Trey Lance fall right into their laps. Last week: No. 29

31. JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS (1-6)

The Jaguars were already bad, but this Sunday they’re starting a rookie, Jake Luton, who literally broke his back the last time he was on a football field. Speaking of Fields and Lance, when the Giants send out their scouts I expect to see the Jags crew standing right next to them. Tanking for Trevor just isn’t working out since the Jets have cornered the market on losing this season. Last week: No. 31

32. NEW YORK JETS (0-8)

And here we are again, Jets. At the bottom of the rankings with no end in sight. It should be impossible for a team to go 0-16 in the modern NFL. Not with a worst picks first draft, open free agency, a salary cap and, more importantly, a salary floor. Yet it’s happened twice in the last 12 years and there’s every indication it will happen again in New York. There does not appear to be a winnable game on their schedule. Maybe the Dolphins, you say? You mean the team whose defense turned Jared Goff’s helmet inside out last week? They still have two games against the Patriots, for God’s sake, and I’m not ruling out a playoff run with those guys. They have games against the aforementioned Rams and Russell Wilson led Seahawks coming up on the schedule too. The Jets need to fire everyone in the building except the cleaning staff, then burn it down and salt the smoldering earth left behind. Last week: No. 32

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