The Red Rifle Has Been Fired

By Adam Greene

Consider Andy Dalton, the former starting quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals. It was a marriage made in panic that lasted nine seasons and resulted in next to nothing.

The Bengals never won a playoff game with Dalton under center, but were usually competitive. Of his nine seasons, he led the team to a winning record in five of them and wrapped up his Cincy career with a 70-65-2 record counting the playoffs.

He got the Bengals to the playoffs five times and started four of them. A broken thumb in 2015 sidelined him in that Wild Card game, an 18-16 ugly loss to the Pittsburgh Steelers that the team would have likely won if Dalton had been able to suit up.

But that was Dalton’s career, really. Just a decade of almosts.

He was never supposed to be the starting quarterback in Cincinnati and if Carson Palmer hadn’t demanded a trade and “retired” before the 2011 NFL Draft, he would have landed somewhere else. Maybe even the San Francisco 49ers, as he was picked one selection above Colin Kaepernick.

More than likely, he would have landed with the New England Patriots at pick no. 74 in the third round, where they grabbed Ryan Mallett out of Arkansas.

There he would have backed up Tom Brady a few years before being invariably traded to the Houston Texans when Bill O’Brien took over, as grabbing Bill Belichick’s table scraps was how O’Brien liked to build a team back then. Now, he just wants to trade away all his good players.

You put Dalton with O’Brien, and it’s a garbage fire. He might hang around the league for a little while, but ultimately, he remains a back up like Brian Hoyer.

So for Andy, it worked out OK, going to Cincinnati. But as careers go, it amounts to a giant shoulder shrug.

Is he an NFL starter? Sure.

He’s a guy that can win games, but can’t win championships. And if you’re not trying to hoist a Vince Lombardi at the end of the season, then what the hell are you doing?

Dalton’s had a solid career. Made plenty of money and will undoubtedly land on a roster before the season starts in September (at least the NFL is saying it will).

Saturday night Dalton agreed to a $3 million contract with the Dallas Cowboys.

It’s a smart move for the Cowboys. He’ll be the best back up in the league and hopefully never play a down. And, really, this will be it for Andy.

Because ultimately players like Dalton are more frustrating than they are anything. They’re not bad enough to replace and they’re not good enough to get your team over the hump. It’s Tony Romo. It’s Chad Pennington. It’s Boomer Esiason. It’s Vinnie Testeverde. It’s Jon Kitna. It’s Ryan Fitzpatrick. It’s Gus Frerotte. And, yes, I realize that five of those guys were former Bengals and that just makes it more ridiculous that they ended up picking him and trying to ride him for most of nine seasons.

There will be no magic in Dallas because for guys like Dalton, there’s no magic anywhere. That’s just who he is. The Bengals are lucky they finally had an excuse to part ways with him.

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