CRAZY NFL PARLAY: NFL WEEK 18

BY ADAM GREENE

Well, I have good news and bad news, my Crazy Parlay Companions. This will be our last Crazy Parlay for the season. Yes, our Wacky Adventures in attempting to harness entropy and chaos and turn it into cold, hard cash ends with the regular season.

But, don’t fret. The NFL schedulers have seen fit to end every year with divisional match ups, some with playoff implications. As such, there’s some excellent moneylines and trends we can capitalize on and turn the price of a trip to Starbucks into a new BMW.

Last week, we were once again close. We hit 4 out of 7, marks we’d been close to in weeks past when we went 8 out of 10 in Week 10 and were the Monday Night Football game away from turning $10 into $11,000 with an 8-team parlay back in Week 3. That one still stings.

This is our last shot, so we need to make it count.

If this is your first foray into the Crazy Parlay, let me explain what I do. I comb the odds, lines and totals each week, crafting the most plausible implausibility, the grouping of games to turn a picture of Alexander Hamilton into a stack of Grover Clevelands.

I’m not just tossing a dart with my eyes closed. I am riding the whirlwind, taking the NFL’s mantra of Any Given Sunday and monetizing it. We’ve come tantalizingly close this year many times. It’s time to lasso this twister.

Here are my final selections for you for the 2021-22 season:

Eagles +168

Lions +150

Jaguars +675

Steelers +165

Dolphins +230

Falcons +160

Raiders +139

You should go ahead and check out my Friday Afternoon Quarterback picks article, because when you do, you’ll see that I’ve already predicted the Pittsburgh Steelers will knock off the Lamar Jackson-less Baltimore Ravens and the Miami Dolphins will upset the New England Patriots.

It’s the other games we need to talk ourselves into, so let’s get to it.

How ridiculous would it be for Mike McCarthy to orchestrate, through his poor clock management and head coaching, back to back defeats for the Dallas Cowboys as they finish the season in a meaningless game at the Philadelphia Eagles?

Aaron Rodgers says he’s playing Sunday for the Green Bay Packers against the Detroit Lions, but I can’t see Matt LaFleur leaving him and the starters in the whole second half. There’s a reason this line is so low.

The Indianapolis Colts have not defeated the Jacksonville Jaguars on the road since 2014, regardless of who was coaching or quarterbacking either team.

It would be just like the Atlanta Falcons to figure out a way to beat the New Orleans Saints at home and take all the fun, urgency and importance out of the San Francisco 49ers at Los Angeles Rams game in the 4:30 block.

And, finally, the Las Vegas Raiders have found a way to win time and again when overmatched. And they’re at home against a Los Angeles Chargers squad that has trouble showing up every week.

A winning $10 bet on this seven team parlay pays $28,206.79.

Follow Adam Greene on Twitter @TheFirstMan.

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