Bad Coach Power Rankings: NFL Week 16

BY ADAM GREENE

Don’t let the “unranked” designation fool you below. I’ve limited the Bad Coach Power Rankings to just five, but if I were to go to a Top 10, you better believe all these guys, plus our usual stalwarts of Jason Garrett, Dan Quinn and Pat Shurmer, would continue to make appearances.

But, you have to reward victories, even when they come against the Miami Dolphins. Garrett got a performance out of the Dallas Cowboys against the Los Angeles Rams that should be an indictment for his coaching all season and do nothing but entice a top tier candidate like Ron Rivera into AT&T Stadium in 2020.

At any rate, those guys still suck. Make no mistake, but they get a week off from the rankings. I hope they enjoy it while they can.

5. MIKE VRABEL, TENNESSEE TITANS

It takes a special kind of coach to let Bill O’Brien come into your home stadium and not only knock you out of first place in the AFC South, but possibly cost you a playoff spot altogether.

I don’t fault Vrabel for giving Marcus Mariota the keys early on in the year, but let’s not pretend the ascension of Ryan Tannehill to Titans’ savior was anything other than dumb luck. Vrabel’s career has been full of that kind of undeserved fortune, including landing this job in the first place after leading a top-ranked Houston Texans defense right into the ground his lone year as a defensive coordinator.

LAST WEEK: UNRANKED
CAREER COACHING RECORD: 17-13
CHANCE OF GETTING FIRED: 0 PERCENT

4. JON GRUDEN, OAKLAND RAIDERS

Jon Gruden is angrier that usual this week since he feels the refs missed an obvious call that cost his team a victory over the Jacksonville Jaguars. And while he’s right, let’s not forget the fact that the team was at home against an East Coast squad, had a significant roster advantage and was playing against a rookie quarterback that was benched a few weeks ago.

On the bright side, if you live in Oakland, that was your last chance to see the Gruden – Raiders garbage fire live. And you certainly won’t see it at its worst. That’ll be next year when Jon brings his brother Jay in as offensive coordinator. But that’s Las Vegas’s problem.

LAST WEEK: NO. 4
CAREER COACHING RECORD: 105-101
CHANCE OF GETTING FIRED: 0 PERCENT

3. ANTHONY LYNN, LOS ANGELES CHARGERS

After a week off the list Anthony Lynn makes his triumphant return after his team presented itself like a female mandrill to the invading Minnesota Vikings Sunday. I realize the Chargers play in a soccer stadium, but that’s no reason to institute the “flop” into your NFL coaching strategy.

Lynn was a bad hire and continues to be a bad coach. Nothing’s changed this season and, with the apathy surrounding this franchise from the front office to the stands, there’s not likely to be any change at all. At this point Phillip Rivers should file his own collusion case against the Chargers and the NFL over why they continually pair him with garbage coaches.

LAST WEEK: UNRANKED
CAREER COACHING RECORD: 26-21
CHANCE OF GETTING FIRED: 20 PERCENT

2. MATT PATRICIA, DETROIT LIONS

I know what you’re thinking and you’ve got a point. There’s a real argument that Matt Patricia should be No. 1 on this list, but I’m giving him a few bonus points for losing Matthew Stafford for the season.

Stafford has single-handedly kept this franchise afloat for the last decade, but that’s also the problem. Patricia was brought in to fix the defense so the team could have a chance without Stafford’s heroics. This season they’ve given up 20 or more points in 12 of their 14 games. Stafford, like Rivers, should have some sort of legal recourse to keep the Fords from keeping Patricia on as they just pledged to do Tuesday.

LAST WEEK: NO. 3
CAREER COACHING RECORD: 9-20
CHANCE OF GETTING FIRED: 0 PERCENT

1. FREDDIE KITCHENS, CLEVELAND BROWNS

Look who’s back atop the bad coaching rankings. Picking the Browns to lose to the significantly better coached Arizona Cardinals last week wasn’t so much a layup as a slam dunk.

Any chance of Cleveland actually finishing .500 for the first time since George W. Bush was president will wrap up this weekend when they host the Baltimore Ravens. Jimmy Haslam is arguably the worst owner in the league and the only arguments against it are Mike Brown in Cincinnati and Dan Snyder in Washington. Either way, he’s a member of a select group. He may not have it in him to hire a real coach and, frankly, a real coach might not be interested.

So, yeah, get ready for Mike McCarthy, Browns fans.

LAST WEEK: UNRANKED
CAREER COACHING RECORD: 6-8
CHANCE OF GETTING FIRED: 80 PERCENT

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