As we go into the final week of the regular season, and our first ever 17 game season, it’s our next to last chance to deliver our arbitrary praise and scorn on all 32 NFL teams.


With the top seed already locked in for the NFC, there’s no reason for head coach Matt LaFleur to let Aaron Rodgers, Devante Adams and most of his key starters see the field against a Detroit Lions team with literally nothing to lose at home. And I mean that. The Lions have locked in the No. 2 overall pick and can’t move up or down, regardless of the final result of this one. Pack it in, Pack. You won’t regret it. Last week: No. 1


While the Packers have nothing to play for Sunday, the Rams do. A win automatically gives then the NFC West championship and the No. 2 seed in the NFC. It would also break a five game losing streak to the San Francisco 49ers. A loss doesn’t knock LA out of the NFC West title, as the Arizona Cardinals would still have to beat the Seattle Seahawks, but this “All In” team can’t back into the playoffs on a loss against a team they have the roster to dominate. A defeat to the 49ers again, in this situation, would all but end any serious Super Bowl hopes for Los Angeles. Last week: No. 3


The Bucs got a nice little scare on the road against the Jets, but what really came from that debacle was the end of the Antonio Brown experience. Tampa Bay watched their star wideout and Tom Brady bestie toss his jersey and equipment into the stands and exit the field shirtless like he was on an episode of Cops. The Buccaneers eventually won and are playing only for seeding Sunday, but they’re down to one quality wide receiver, Mike Evans, who himself isn’t completely healthy as they embark on their Super Bowl defense. Last week: No. 4


The Titans stumbled into the top seed in the AFC when the Kansas City Chiefs took a tumble in the final seconds against the Cincinnati Bengals. They have to win Sunday to keep it, but will have reinforcements coming in the possible return of Derrick Henry from injured reserve. He probably won’t play, but you can rest assured that you’ll see him in a couple of weeks in the playoffs. Tennessee really needs that bye. Last week: No. 6


A last second field goal from the Cincinnati Bengals knocked the Chiefs from the top seed and into the Wild Card round. While they’ll definitely host at least one playoff game, unless the Titans fall in the Divisional Round, they’ll likely have to play one on the road. Here’s a fun fact: Patrick Mahomes has never played in a road playoff game in his career. Last week: No. 2


The bleeding stopped as the Cardinals picked up a big win in Dallas against the Cowboys. Arizona is already in the NFC playoffs, but a victory Sunday against the Seahawks and a Rams loss to the 49ers will land them an NFC West Championship and home playoff game. Last week: No. 8


Thanks to Mike McCarthy Mike McCarthy-ing all over the place Sunday night, the Cowboys now find themselves as the No. 4 seed coming into the final week of the season. While that still means they’ll have a home playoff game, it would be against those same Cardinals or the Rams. And even if they somehow get by one of those teams, their next trip would more than likely be to Green Bay to face Aaron Rodgers on two weeks’ toe rest. It was a bad loss, is what I’m saying. They should rest starters Saturday to prep for whatever they can come the Wild Card Round next week. Last week: No. 5


A month ago, Cincinnati was completely out of the playoff bracket. Now, after a shocking last second win over the Chiefs, they’re the AFC North Champions and a week and a half away from hosting a playoff game. Joe Burrow has a legit shot at winning the NFL’s Comeback Player of the Year and J’Marr Chase surely has Offensive Rookie of the Year locked up. Last week: No. 10


The Bills have already secured a playoff spot, but with a victory over the New York Jets Sunday, they’ll secure their second consecutive AFC East Championship. They’ll be the first team that’s not the New England Patriots to win back to back AFC East titles since the 1990 and 1991 Buffalo Bills. Last week: No. 9


Speaking of the Pats, if the Bills do stumble and New England knocks off the Dolphins, then they’ll be back atop the NFC East for the 18th time in the last 21 years. There’s not a great chance of it happening and that usually means a team can rest its starters before the playoffs, but rookie QB Mac Jones needs the reps and Bill Belichick will rest when he’s dead and usurping Satan as the new Lord of Hell. Last week: No. 11


Carson Wentz got off the NFL’s Covid reserve list in time for kick off last week, but played like a guy that spent the five days before fighting off a deadly respiratory disease. Indy is in the postseason with a victory at the Jacksonville Jaguars, but they haven’t beaten the Jags on the road since 2014. Last week: No. 7


Jimmy Garoppolo’s thumb injury has persisted and it’ll likely be Trey Lance once again taking the Niners into battle against a team they’ve dominated for two and a half years. Garoppolo has never lost to the Rams. Lance has never played the Rams. To add to the drama, if the New Orleans Saints win earlier in the day and San Fran loses, they’re out of the playoffs. Last week: No. 13


The Chargers control their destiny. A win over the Las Vegas Raiders Sunday puts them in the playoffs. A loss puts them on their Lay-Z-Boys. Last week: No. 15


The Eagles have secured a playoff spot and all they can do Sunday is embarrass the Mike McCarthy led Cowboys. So bet accordingly. Last week: No. 16


In spite of a season to forget, the Raiders are alive for a postseason berth and control their own destiny to get there. All they have to do is beat the Chargers. Last week: No. 17


Thanks to Ben Roethlisberger’s lap of victory Monday night at Heinz Field, he’s earned the chance to go out on his shield in the playoffs. All the Steelers need to make it happen is a victory over the Baltimore Ravens and for the Jaguars to upset the Colts. Last week: No. 20


Their QB situation may still be a mess, but the Saints can claim the final NFC Wild Card spot with a win Sunday at the Atlanta Falcons and a 49ers loss. Last week: No. 22


Lamar Jackson has a chance to play against the Steelers Sunday, but since the Ravens are playing for nothing, they might as well sit him out and get him 100 percent healthy for next year. And, while we’re talking about next year, how about firing offensive coordinator Greg Roman while you’re at it? Last week: No. 14


The Dolphins went from holding down a playoff spot to being instantly eliminated last week after their loss to the Titans. Now, all they can do is make sure the Patriots have no chance at another AFC East title. Last week: No. 12


Just in case you needed one more piece of evidence that Baker Mayfield should walk the plank, you had Monday night’s meltdown in a winnable game where Cleveland’s defense was playing out of its mind. Last week: No. 18


Word is that Mike Zimmer is coaching his last game for the Vikings Sunday. I’m sure no one is more excited about it than Mike Zimmer. Last week: No. 19


Now that we’re talking about fired coaches, there’s no reason to keep Vic Fangio’s name out of the ejector seat. Denver isn’t letting anything slip just yet, but whether he stays or not, there needs to be a completely new offense and new quarterback, regardless of what it costs. Last week: No. 21


It took 17 weeks but the Falcons finally proved my preseason playoff prediction wrong. All it took for me to know it would happen was watching them play in Week 1. Last week: No. 23

24. CHICAGO BEARS (6-10)

It’s like we can’t stop stumbling across coaches that either will be fired or probably should be fired, which sounds about right for this section of the list. Of all the open jobs, the Bears look pretty good to me with solid playmakers on both sides of the ball and an exciting second year quarterback. I’d call up Doug Pederson before the final whistle stops echoing Sunday. Last week: No. 25


While I don’t think the Seahawks should “fire” Pete Carroll, I do think it’s time for him to hang up that Microsoft Surface tablet there’s no way he’s learned how to use and call it a Hall of Fame career. I definitely wouldn’t start a Russell Wilson-less rebuild with him at the helm. Last week: No. 27


The WFT is about to get a name, along with a new quarterback and, hopefully for Ron Rivera’s sake, half a new roster. My money is on the Admirals, primarily because it looks like what Washington actually fumbled out in their teaser video. Last week: No. 24


Sam Darnold’s return looked exactly like we all expected it would. Now, thanks to their trade to acquire the former first rounder, they’re stuck with, at least, his contract for another year regardless of what they do at QB. And there aren’t a ton of options. Last week: No. 26

28. NEW YORK JETS (4-12)

As a nice little treat for not only putting a scare into the Bucs, but helping end Antonio Brown’s stint with the defending Super Bowl Champions, I’ve bumped them up a spot. Enjoy it, fellas. Last week: No. 29


Will David Culley survive the offseason coach purge? And does anyone outside of the Texans offices care? And who would even want this job with its own Jim Jones helping run the team? Last week: No. 28

30. NEW YORK GIANTS (4-12)

I don’t want to say that Joe Judge is on crack, but this rant to the media after his team’s latest debacle looked awful “crack-ish” as Jamie Foxx used to say. Last week: No. 30

31. DETROIT LIONS (2-13-1)

Just in time to do nothing to mess up the Lions draft position, Jared Goff looks to make his return, Considering that the Packers are playing for nothing and will likely sit their starters, this could be a good chance for Goff to up that Detroit record and make us all some money in the process. Last week: No. 31


The great thing about the Jaguars potentially hiring Jim Caldwell as their next head coach is, when he’s garbage and the team is garbage, then no one in either the NFL or in NFL punditry that will ever bring up Jim Caldwell as an NFL head coach ever again. This is the kind of mess you have on your hands when you refuse to fire one of the worst general managers (Trent Baalke) in professional sports. On the plus side, these No. 1 overall picks will look great in Rams uniforms in a couple of years. Last week: No. 32

Follow Adam Greene on Twitter @TheFirstMan.

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